i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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