Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
