Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
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