i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
he just fucked me for my cheese.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
