Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize