I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I just forgot I was standing up.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
