I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Is Oprah even human
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
