fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize
