I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
