my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
as a side note pls kill me
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize