There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
