I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Randomize
