That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Randomize
