Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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