Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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