he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
