You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
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