Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
