I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize