I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
