K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
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