You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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