I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
