Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
