Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
