you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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