Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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