I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
