when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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