So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
i dont even know how to be here
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
