He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
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