Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
