actually, I'm a sock model
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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