What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
