i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
