oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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