im drinking this country out of the recession.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize