he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
