Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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