I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I don't want my vagina anymore.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
