wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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