umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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