She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Randomize
