You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
