do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
