i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
