Sponge bath it is.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
