Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
