Grow some girl-balls and come out already
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
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