The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
